Field Guide to Using Commas

Ah, the comma.

If you’ve never deliberated over whether or not to use a comma in your writing, then you’re smarter than 99% of the people on this planet and should probably be running for president. Or making bank on “Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader?” (is that show even on anymore??) … or, at the very least, you should be writing your own blog right now instead of wasting your precious genius time reading mine.

Assuming you are not in that 1%, keep reading for a chance to flex your comma muscles while learning a little about football in the process!

Before we kick off, let’s lead with a disclaimer of sorts. The comma is one of the trickiest, messiest, most commonly argued over components of English grammar. No one—I repeat, NO ONE—agrees 100% on how to use it. I could honestly devote every single blog post of my career to analyzing the comma and its many correct or incorrect usages. But for the sake of your sanity and mine, today we are only going to focus on the main five.

Disclaimer #2: I am a Patriots fan. You may or may not be a Patriots fan. While we might pass each other on the street in opposing gear and scowl viciously at each other from behind our sunglasses, I genuinely want to help you with your grammar. And this post will help you with your grammar. That being said, if your hatred of “the G.O.A.T.” Tom Brady is so strong that you can’t read his name without shaking uncontrollably and smashing your work computer into tiny bits, I suggest you find a different avenue to strengthen your comma knowledge. Otherwise, let’s begin!

FIRST QUARTER: “FANBOYS”

You probably learned this rule in school, but let me reiterate it for you. Commas should be used before any of the following conjunctions—for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so, A.K.A. “FANBOYS”—when the conjunction separates two independent clauses.

What is an independent clause, you ask?

Well, an independent clause is a phrase that could easily stand on its own as a complete sentence. When two independent clauses are smushed together into one sentence, they are often joined by one of the seven conjunctions listed above. This conjunction should be preceded by a comma.

Incorrect: Brady drops back and looks to the left but he finds no one there to receive the pass.

Correct: Brady drops back and looks to the left, but he finds no one there to receive the pass.

Also Correct: Brady drops back, and looks to the left, but he finds no one there to receive the pass.

Tip: Sometimes too many commas in one sentence can become tiresome. Try reading the sentence above and see if it flows better with or without that second comma. What do you think? If it were up to me, I would go with the single comma option, but both are grammatically correct.

SECOND QUARTER: READY, SET …

Have you ever had the power go out right in the middle of a really intense TV moment? The ball has been hiked, the quarterback is in the pocket, the winning touchdown is just ten yards away … Cut to black.

While that level of suspense can lead to a string of curse words and spilled drinks in real life, in writing, it is often just the sentiment we’re going for.

Whenever you start a sentence with an incomplete phrase …

… you should place a comma in front of the subject to simulate a pause …

… before bringing the sentence to a satisfying conclusion.

Incorrect: Running to the sidelines Edelman accepted a high-five from Gronkowski.

Correct: Running to the sidelines, Edelman accepted a high-five from Gronkowski.

Incorrect: Although he had celebrated his fortieth birthday Brady was not ready to throw in the towel just yet.

Correct: Although he had celebrated his fortieth birthday, Brady was not ready to throw in the towel just yet.

HALFTIME: THE INTERRUPTION

Sometimes it’s necessary to add a clarifying phrase to a subject, particularly when your readers aren’t familiar with the subject at hand or might not remember exactly who/what it is you’re referring to. For example, for those who have ignored all things football for the last five years, the following sentence would mean next to nothing:

Butler will always be my Super Bowl hero.

Those who haven’t heard of the amazing interception by Malcolm Butler in Super Bowl XLIX are probably living under a rock, and might assume that I’m referring to my family’s butler, who serves up bowls of soup with incredible skill and finesse. (Disclaimer #3: My family doesn’t have a butler.)

To avoid social blunders such as these, we insert a clarifying phrase between the beginning of the sentence and the end. This phrase is marked by commas both before and after it.

Correct: Butler, who caught the biggest game-winning interception in Super Bowl history, will always be my Super Bowl hero.

Incorrect: Butler who caught the biggest game-winning interception in Super Bowl history will always be my Super Bowl hero.

You can see why this last statement is incorrect, right? The words are all jumbled together in a rush. Would you want someone to speak this line without taking a single breath to pause and allow the information to sink in? I don’t think so.

THIRD QUARTER: TWO-POINT CONVERSION

A two-point conversion occurs when the offense scores a touchdown and decides to go for two additional points instead of one. Why don’t they just do that all the time, you ask? Well, two-point conversions are harder to achieve, but with a solid game plan, they can be very effective.

Sometimes we want to describe a noun using not just one adjective, but two! In this case, a comma should be placed between the two adjectives.

Incorrect: Although quiet grumpy Belichick never cracks a smile, you can tell he really loves to win.

Correct: Although quiet, grumpy Belichick never cracks a smile, you can tell he really loves to win.

But be careful! If the second adjective is actually an essential part of the noun, a comma should not be used.

Incorrect: There’s nothing more enjoyable than a nail-biting, football game.

Correct: There’s nothing more enjoyable than a nail-biting football game.

Because “football game” is the entire noun, we do not need a comma to precede it.

FOURTH QUARTER: SERIAL COMMA FOR THE WIN!

Note: This last one is heavily debated, and there are many grammar enthusiasts who would argue both sides of the coin. But, like any good coach, I’ll tell you what I think works the best.

Whenever you have a list containing three or more items, use a comma after each item, INCLUDING the next-to-last.

Some refer to this as the Oxford comma, or the serial comma. Although the serial comma is not always necessary, I find that it adds the most clarity. Whether you choose to use it or not, however, the most important thing is to stay consistent.

Correct: Brady, Gronkowski and Edelman celebrated the winning touchdown in the end zone.

MORE Correct: Brady, Gronkowski, and Edelman celebrated the winning touchdown in the end zone.

Not much difference, you say? Well, let me give you an example of where the serial comma really comes in handy.

Incorrect: My biggest heroes are my parents, Tom Brady and Malcolm Butler.

Why is this incorrect? Read it again! The way this sentence is written, it sounds like Tom Brady and Malcolm Butler are your parents! If this were true, you would be one lucky kid. But alas, we can’t all be the spawn of two legendary NFL players.

Correct: My biggest heroes are my parents, Tom Brady, and Malcolm Butler.

There. That’s better, isn’t it?

GAME SUMMARY:

Use a comma whenever you want to add clarity to a sentence, or just give your reader a signal to pause and take a breath. And most importantly, stay consistent in your writing! Tom Brady wouldn’t be “the G.O.A.T.” if he only played a great game half of the time. So don’t be wishy-washy with your commas!

That’s all for this month! Thanks for reading, and GO PATS!